Now playing Atmosphere - Yesterday
At least we know he didn’t trade in for the Shinigami eyes.
Tokyo ghoul op starts playing because fuck you
I was at a party once, a little drunk, told a girl I was psychic and could guess her name. I thought it would be a good icebreaker, we would laugh at me guessing wrong etc.
I got it right. She thought I was a stalker or something and told all her friends to stay away from me.
Good times.
Depending on the age of the person, you’ve got a 10% chance of getting it right if you guess Sarah.
I just picked the name of someone I went to school with that looked kinda similar. In hindsight I should have used Hildegard or something.
I had an obscure/rare name tattooed on my arm. I was at a place and this girl called out to her friend, and it was the rare name.
So I moved over to them slowly so as not to make it obvious and mid convo I said hey are you (name), she was like yeah? And I raised my sleeve. Her seing her rare name as a tattoo…the shock and stuff , her face was priceless.
Did you two fuck afterwards?
No, I was like 40 at my kids baseball game and she was under 20. Just a good parlor trick
Yes.
Obama was there
Thanks Obama.
(☞ﾟヮﾟ)☞
Women ☕
Cringe
Hey I’m a woman and I said it ironically but if you feel like contorting your face & body in response to one word someone else said, then hey it’s your life.
So in high school, I had to drop out my senior year. Rumors get around and I was at one of my best buddies’ birthday party. I’m talking to my ex gf and she’s really down. More than I can reasonably understand. I start prying. She eventually tells me that she used to date someone who looked like me but not also like a skeleton and he just died and talking to me was really harshing her buzz. I gave her the old Forrest Whittaker eye™ and asked her what she thought my name was.
She spent the next ten minutes excitedly dashing around the party telling everyone and anyone that I was alive, so her shock seemed genuine. I should have asked her how she thought I died.
Could the other people at the party see you too, or…?
yeah. like there had been rumors i’d died. i don’t remember who started them. hell, it might have been me i was a little shit but i disappeared rather suddenly.
MG: “Shit, guys, I was supposed to be at my gf’s recital - cover for me!”
GF: “Hey, I’m looking for MG he was supposed to b-”
Guy1: “Oh he ded.”
GF: “… he’s… he’s -”
Guy1: “- Ded. Yeah.”
GF: “… I… I… what…”
Guy1: “Aight, take care now.”yup. he had the terminal butt disease. it’s true.
“I got better”
“i had to have my butt removed, but after a few grueling years… anyways what were we talking about”
Rumors were so much more fun before social media and smart phones.
My name used to be Rachel but they made it illegal in my country after the Friends finale so I had to change it to Dave. It doesn’t really suit me but it’s nice whenever I introduce myself people are like “wow. Dave, that’s such a unique name”. I’ve only ever met one other Dave in my life and he was a total loser like me so we hit it off pretty well and got married 6 days ago at a Asian grocery store in The Dominican Republic.
I hope I meet another Dave one day so I can marry him too. I’ve considered changing my name back to Rachel since it doesn’t seem to be illegal anymore but you know that name just doesn’t suit me as well as Dave.
Dave’s not here, man.
This sounds like the kind of almost close-to-reality story an AI would tell
It makes me sad that we have reached a point where the very randomness that makes these kinds of stories charming (to someone with a twisted sense of humor like myself) also make them less likely to be coming from a human instead of more.
I sympathise with your username. I’ve picked up a habit of using dashes too, but because LLMs are apparently trained on the same writing style that I’m compulsively imitating, that habit tends to be mistaken as an identifier for LLM-slop—an understandable confusion, given that most people don’t casually use it, but I tend to fall into linguistic patterns with little regard for the context I’m writing in. I’ll accidentally use informalities in professional writing as well, but whereas I’ll make an effort to correct my tone in professional contexts, I just can’t be arsed to apply the same diligence in a casual one.
No LLM version of ‘holds up spork’?
This sort of randomness seems more like the text produced by a markov chain than a modern LLM.
Right, mhm, cause we all know you’re totally human, right? aha, aha
Yesterday we were having a conversatiion about how AI can only make mundane stories like Avatar.
The opposite of this.
But i feel both ae true.
æ
I have a note against their user, “Absurdist”. I don’t know whether they’re using an LLM to generate these, and, to be honest, I was somewhat iritated by them at first, but I’ve come to enjoy their occasional bouts of weirdness in random threads.
How the hell would I generate these using a Liquor License of Montreal? That makes about as much sense as shaving a kiwi to ride an airplane toy to the oven.
shaving a kiwi to ride an airplane toy to the oven.
You’re a poet. Where do I subscribe?
Honestly I miss early AI.
I miss the ugly art. I miss the weird tangents. I miss Will Smith eating spaghetti and consuming himself.
I know you can set up a quick AI to relive this… But it was better when it was the norm.
This reads like something Chris Simpsons Artist would say. Back when I used to use Instagram I followed his account and all of his captions were like this. It was great. Glad to see someone on Lemmy writes like him.
wat
Pretty straight forward, really. It’s a story as old as time.
All the people I know that go by Dave are 60+ years old. David is the youthful version.
1 Joule / sec?
kilogram-metre-squared per second cubed‽
Can’t believe people upvote this shit.
Guess I’ll just block this account then.
Replying to you!
Isn’t it fun yelling what you’re doing?
Submitting Reply now!
Nobody asked.
Ooo ooo, block me too!!! I wouldn’t want you to accidentally have any fun!
licks your forehead
Guess I’ll never get into Jay’s bone zone. Love you Doug.
Block4Block? 😘
I thought it was silly and funny. It has classic Reddit all over it.
What english speaking country has both ‘high school’ and trains?
Edit: ok turns out the twitter account is based in LA
New York City
We do have trains in the US, they’re just awful in most places.
Australia
We have both of these things in Canada.
American cities have limited local rail networks, at least some. Like New York and Boston and err, the other ones…
Chicago is fairly well known for having trains as well. That said, I’ve never lived somewhere in the U.S. where you wouldn’t hear train horns at some point usually freight, but transport does happen as well. Dropped someone off at the train station in Nashville so they could go visit family in Michigan a little while back
Ahh I see, I guess it doesn’t rule out the tweeter being American then
Yeah, the U.S. has something like 140,000 miles of railroads, 14x that of of a country like the UK, but because the U.S. is so massive, it is just inconvenient for most travelers, so it gets used mostly for freight shipping. (Also most of it is not high speed rails, so for many, it doesn’t make the trip for efficient time and or price wise, knowing they will likely still need to rent a car when they get to their destination)
Woah that’s a lot more rail than I was expecting!
Yup turns out the tweeter is in LA
“And the rest…here on Gilligans Island!!!”
Chicago
I live in three different cities and in those cities, people use train, subway, and trolley interchangeably.
We have trains in Utah, and high schools.
Trains AND high schools in Utah?
Tooele, Ute for a whales vagina I believe…
England
England doesn’t have high school, here it’s secondary school and sixth form
I went to a high school in England. We had first (1-4) middle (5-8) high school (9-11).
I also had this format but apparently it’s not usual. I’m guessing by your username you’re Scottish, or at least Northern
When/where was this? I thought the system I had in east anglia was standard across the country
West Midlands, about 20 years ago. You would think there’d be some standardisation, but the more people I meet the more random it all seems.
You would think there’d be some standardisation
Wait we can’t do that we’re British
We haven’t been known for trains in a while, but America
I guess he could have meant subway by train
We already have light rail and even heavy rail commuter trains in many places.
Yeah Seattle loves their light rail. Way more cities in America have commuter rail than you’d think
I don’t believe you.
Dominican Republic doesn’t have Asian grocery stores with enough space to host a wedding.
That’s what made it so special
Should’ve went with Ashley instead.
Then she’d be Wario’s girl.
Dont know that reference
Wario is a character in the super mario bros universe. On the gamecube and game boy advance, Wario dated (or maybe still is dating?) Ashley.
Ashley left Wario for Leon
