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ickplant@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 1 day ago

Rough date

lemmy.world

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Rough date

lemmy.world

ickplant@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world · 1 day ago
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  • SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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    1 day ago

    I, too, always keep an open bottle of vodka in my car, accessible from the driver’s seat. It’s just common sense.

    • tomiant@piefed.social
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      9 hours ago

      I also sit in the parking lot before a date just staring at people in the cars next to me.

    • thisisbutaname@discuss.tchncs.de
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      13 hours ago

      So when the cops stop you, you can take a swig right in front of them. Then they can’t prove you were drunk before that and can’t give you a DUI

    • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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      20 hours ago

      I like to take a shot every time I see a black car, gets me ready for work in the morning. Obviously I don’t drink and drive that would be dangerous, I wait until I’m traffic lights.

    • Texas_Hangover@lemmy.radio
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      1 day ago

      Of course! You dont want to be fumbling around god knows where for that shit! Its unsafe.

      • bizarroland@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        Exactly, that’s why I keep it right next to my loaded pistol and bag of oxy

        • SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world
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          1 day ago

          It’s embarrassing when you go for a shot of vodka and end up with a pistol barrel in your mouth instead.

          • potoooooooo 🥔@lemmy.world
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            19 hours ago

            Classic Wednesday night.

          • EvilHankVenture@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            I was going to make a pun about Russian roulette with vodka or a bullet, but I realized vodka or bullet would still just be Russian roulette.

          • Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            Happens all. The. Time.

      • usualsuspect191@lemmy.ca
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        1 day ago

        You can put it in a water bladder and strap it to the sun visor. Now you have a handy straw and then it’s as simple as taking a sip whenever you feel your vision go unblurry

    • masta_chief@sh.itjust.works
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      1 day ago

      The vast majority of accidents are caused by sober drivers. Thank you for doing your part to keep our roads safe!

    • superduperpirate@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      A fifth of vodka, a loaded & unregistered pistol, a crack pipe, and a photo album of me walking by adorable dogs and not stopping to offer pets.

      • tomiant@piefed.social
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        9 hours ago

        Not offering pets

        You might as well have a child in the trunk at that point, you monster.

      • SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world
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        1 day ago

        No meth pipe? No videos of you putting kittens in dumpsters? Fucking amateur

        • superduperpirate@lemmy.world
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          1 day ago

          I know. I’m slacking off. My bad.

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